Be Present

In the midst of the self-induced insanity of holidays and family and work and… well, life, I’ve come to realize that it’s not the chaos that is hard… It’s being truly present in life.

It’s far easier to allow fear to guide our choices and prevent us from truly living. To second guess what we should do or say or think or feel…

Over the holiday break, I’ve started practicing just being present and in whatever moment I’m in. It’s been harder than I would have expected. The funny thing is, now that I’ve got a full time teenager in the house, being present is the most important thing I can do for him…and me.

Sitting and listening to the words he says… and doesn’t. Taking a break from wondering if I’m doing/saying the right things and just loving. He’s starting to open up a lot more now that he feels more safe and secure. He’s learning to trust. He’s learning about acceptance. It’s remarkably beautiful.

And in the midst of caring for him, I’m also learning that by being present, I’m caring for me.

I’m not looking at the million other things I need to do when we are just sitting down to dinner… I’m not only confiscating his phone during family time, but I’m learning to put mine away as well.

When out with friends – whether for an afternoon of shopping or lunch or dinner or a movie, I’m learning to focus on the activity at hand instead of all the things I could be, should be, would be doing.

How much strife and drama could be avoided in my world if I truly relished in everything I had instead of the few things I didn’t… How much easier would it be to leave the past in the past and to not second guess the choices made. Every morning is a blank slate to start a new page in the book of my life.

Being present doesn’t mean I don’t still plan… I’m not wandering aimlessly bumping into things… I still plan and write out my to-do lists (and today’s is considerably longer than I’d like) but whether I’m at work, at home, with friends, or just driving down the road, I’m giving myself permission to just be… and taking comfort that everything will get handled in time.

For those who know me, you are probably laughing hysterically at the control freak/multi-tasker talking about focusing on being present… and TRUST ME, I still have a lot to learn… but even in a short amount of time, I’ve noticed a difference. And in time, I think the Giant will too… because how can I teach him the skills he needs if I don’t practice them myself.

Happy Monday Everyone. I hope you find a few moments to just be present today.

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