If I were a boy…

If I were a boy | Slightly off KilterMost days, I love being a girl. I love frilly girl things like nail polish and big hair and dresses…. and boobs. Who doesn’t like boobs? Cleavage is a magical thing. But… if you haven’t figured out yet, I’m a bit of a dude sometimes too. I like being a grease monkey and playing in the dirt with my boys.

Originally this post was chock full of ways that being a girl is confusing. Especially when it comes to relationships.

And then… I hit CTRL-A and Deleted every last word.

Mostly because being a girl isn’t confusing. Being a human and interacting with other humans is confusing. Hiding your feelings for fear of rejection is confusing.{and dumb} Holding back the questions that you are afraid of the answers is confusing.{and silly} That’s life.

Instead, I opted for the true nature of this prompt.

If I were a boy:

  • I’d write my name in the snow just because I could
  • I’d relish in the lack of an emotional roller coaster
  • I’d read a text or email without trying to figure out what it all means, seeing something in what WASN’T said
  • I’d roll outta bed and throw on the first clean thing I found {oh wait – I mostly do that already}
  • I’d learn how to fix cars and computers and stuff around the house so I could help my friends when needed.{wait – me again}
  • I’d spend an entire weekend watching nothing but porn {um}
  • I’d speak my mind without fear of being labeled a bitch {me again…}
  • I’d burp loudly and then laugh with my friends about it {well….}

Maybe I am a dude in disguise…

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Axis of Ineptitude

Looking for the whole list of prompts? They are in text form and image so you can Come Play In May!

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Comments

  1. As a single parent it’s my responsibility to take care of the blue jobs. So I recently taught my daughter about dutch ovens. She nailed it on the first try! She calls it a ditch oven though. Perhaps more appropriate since it smelled like something dead in a ditch.

  2. Well, you’re the sexiest dude I know. And your boobs are magnificent!
    🙂
    Traci

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