Bittersweetness

Y’all know I’m an UBER proud mama.  I love love love love that I was blessed with some amazeballs kids… I know every mom prolly says that… well, except perhaps Evin over at Food Good Laundry Bad who open states her kids are possessed (I disagree – I love her kids and they adore me but hey, who am I to argue with their mama)

Mine are amazing.  They both compete in Jr. Triathlons and swim team… the eldest is in the band… they volunteer to help with painting the house or other home improvement projects… the youngest is my budding chef and we make memories in the kitchen… both want to help me when I work on the beast… and yet, even at 10 and almost 13, they still surprise me with kisses and “I love yous” when I drop them off for school or with taking my hand in theirs when we cross a busy parking lot.

I know that my babies aren’t babies anymore.  I know that they are growing up – quite nicely in fact – and I will even go so far as to say that, even if not parenting together, the Ex and I are doing some things right.

Even though I KNOW all of this, NOTHING prepared me for what should have been a quick and easy run to the store to pick up some new clothes for the eldest.

He turns 13 soon.  Too Soon.  When asked what he wanted for his birthday, all he said was “Facebook.  I’m old enough now” and my heart broke a little.  Luckily, his dad disagrees and I’m making him the heavy on this one and we can go a bit longer without me having to block my son from my Facebook page.  (If you follow me there, you understand… if you don’t, WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR? but alas, I digress.)

I also noticed that the last time he was with me, he was uber excited to wear his “ski sweater” to school during the last cold snap and suddenly, my rough and tumble boy who would wear the same shorts every day for a week if I let him is concerned with his appearance… uh oh…

So, I decided that it was time.  Time for him to have nice clothes and to even take them back and forth between his houses if that’s what he wants and so off to Kohls I went.

As I walked in, a few days after the Black Friday madness, I walked past the sparkly holiday tops and dresses… past the jewelry counter that always catches my eye… past even the “boys” section because quite frankly, I can’t recall the last time that I could buy clothes there for the eldest.  Just this past weekend I realized he’s now officially taller than me…

*sigh*

I selected a sweater, a long sleeve shirt he was eyeing the weekend before, and a couple pairs of pants along with a new, bigger belt and made my way to the counter.  There may have been a tear or two in my eye throughout the process.

Once I got home and was showing the folks what all I had picked up, dad takes one look at the pants and says something that is now forever etched in my brain.

“I guess I need to start saving all my old jeans for C.  He can almost wear them already”

Wait – WHAT?!?!?! NO!!!  This can NOT be happening! My BABY can not be almost the same size as my Daddy…

I’m not sad that my babies are growing up.  I’m quite happy with it in fact.  They are amazing and wonderful.  It’s just bittersweet…

and that’s ok, because I still remind them, that no matter how big they get… no matter how old they are… and no matter how much smarter they *think* they are… they will ALWAYS be my babies.