This seems familiar…

Funny thing about vacations… There’s always that bit of downtime where you can really think. (At least for me that’s how it works.) There I sit in the mountains where everything is still and quiet (mostly because the boys are asleep) where I’ve got no pressures pulling me in a million different directions and I can actually breathe. And think. 

My latest Colorado adventure was no different and as I sat in the dark staring up at the stars I began to really look at my life and what I need to change to find my happy. 

That last sentence may surprise some of you… You see me on the book of face or even in person and I SEEM happy… I make jokes and smile a lot… But true joy has been elusive lately. The kind of joy that fills you to the core of your being… The kind of joy that yields a solid night’s sleep… The kind of joy that arms you for the daily battle that is life. 

If you know me at all, you know I don’t play the victim. Yes, shit happens. Yes, things can be hard. But at the end of the day, I pride myself on taking control of my life and not allowing circumstances to define me. So, I had to look at the things that were blocking my joy and came up with a few things that need adjusting. And while they are truly simple in nature, their impact is profound. 

People will only treat you the way you let themThe first thing I realized was that I had slipped back into a pattern of feeling unworthy… People treat you the way you believe you deserve to be treated. It’s a saying that is hard to hear sometimes but if you don’t allow someone to treat you like a doormat, then they can’t. And why would you allow that if you didn’t believe on some level that you deserved it? 

 I had already begun the process of finding a new job before my vacation and as luck would have it, I got the offer while sitting mountainside- literally.  We were having lunch in the middle of our ATV adventure of the day when I noticed a new voicemail.  Of course I called back and got the good news and was able to celebrate with my parents while the boys were off running the ATV’s through the creek.   Having worked at the same company for almost 9 years, I breathed a sigh of relief at the idea of a new adventure.  When you feel under appreciated, over-worked, and definitely under paid, it’s fairly easy to run out of gas.  I knew that’s where I was and was thankful for the opportunity to make a change.

Beyond the professional though, I took an opportunity to look at some of my personal relationships as well… and I was a little sad to see some of the same characteristics in some of those relationships too. Those changes are harder but still necessary and in process.  

The second thing I noticed is that I’ve reverted back into old patterns of shoving my feelings down and smothering them with food. Which isn’t exactly helping me to reach my physical goals… Which depresses me and makes me want to eat more which… Well you can see that vicious cycle. 

healthier meIf you’ve been around here for any length of time, you know that this is a battle I’ve fought for… well, forever.  I’m not a vain person – at least I don’t think I am – but it IS important that I feel comfortable in my skin.  And lately… I don’t.  According to the scale and the way my jeans fit, it’s not that I’ve gained weight… just that I’m not losing it any more… and didn’t lose all that much the last time I tried to lose weight and get fit.

That too needs to change.  Here’s the thing though… I know what to do.  I do how to eat right and work out.  I know what exercise combinations work and what foods are the best for me.  I know how to count calories and steps… And… for the last few years, I’ve been trying to do it on my own and you know what?  That’s not exactly working out for me. 

I’m really good at a lot of things… asking for help is most definitely not one of them.  So as I pondered how to truly take control of my weight, I considered a number of options.  I knew that doing it on my own was only going to yield the same results I’d seen so far… I knew the success I had with Nutri-system back in 1991 and thought about how utilizing a true weight loss center might again be the answer for me.  If you follow the programs, they work.  It’s fool proof and right now, with a new job and all the other changes swirling around me, I could use a little “fool proof” in my world.  But which to choose?  

And then, as if a sign, I got an email asking if I would be interested in working with a local Medifast clinic as their blog ambassador.  I had already heard good things about Medifast because a good friend had been on their program quite successfully.  

I know that there will be critics who cry and scream about the chemicals in the processed foods and preach to me the necessity of real food, and while I appreciate their/your concern, this is something I feel I truly need to do. For me. I need someone to simplify this so that I can focus on all the other things on my plate {pun intended} and I know that when I have a plan of “eat this” without the muss and fuss of actually preparing my meals, I can be successful.

As a blog ambassador for Medifast, I have agreed to update you fine folks with my progress through the program and I will try not to overwhelm you with those posts.  All of the opinions will be honest and my own because as you well know, I don’t sugar coat. That’s what the bakery is for… mmmm… doughnuts… Wait – what?

I met with the staff of the Medifast clinic nearest me today {ironic timing since the Listen to your Mother videos are LIVE TODAY and the camera adds like 60 lbs} and I’m going to share more thoughts on that next week when I officially begin this new chapter so cheer me on, share your victories or struggles, whatever you feel compelled to comment below… knowing that I reserve the right to delete stupid or mean comments.  If you too are on a health/feel better/weight loss journey, let’s do this together.  You don’t have to do it my way – find what works for you, but accountability makes all the difference in the world. And it’s always easier to tackle mountains when you are surrounded by friends.


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